The worst shot of my life: A story about God.

I realize that I am not a great writer. The sad truth is that I do not read enough. (I’m a good speaker though, strangely enough, considering that I do not listen very much either) I would love to be a better storyteller. I have been very inspired by some of the great spiritual stories of the world (E.g. the Ramayan, the story of David (in Samuel 1 and 2) and the book of Daniel) and I would love to create such moving stories myself.

I am not a great teacher, either. But I have a work around for that, which I have mentioned before. I have absolute faith that God is the greatest possible teacher, and he will help me to be a good teacher whenever I truly rely on him. (Notice that I didn’t say “ask him”, because it takes more than asking. You have to trust him.) Whenever I have truly relied on God for help in the classroom, he has delivered mini miracles.

By that same logic, God must also be the greatest storyteller. In fact, many if not all religions consider their greatest stories to have been inspired by God (In the form of the Holy Spirit in the case of Christianity).

So, although I do not feel the Holy Spirit tapping my keyboard at this exact moment, I am going to try to recount one of God’s stories in my life. It is a short one, so please bear with me.

As you know, I used to be a brother in a Roman Catholic religious order. It was only for a few years, but they were the most transformative years of my life. My second year was particularly special. I was sent to Ireland for my novitiate, and we lived a monastic style of life where we followed a fixed schedule of communal prayer and worship 7 days a week for the whole year. Many monks and nuns follow the same or even more demanding schedules for their whole lives. But for me, it was a challenging experience.

I was used to being more independent. My life always had a lot of variety. And I was also used to the feeling of accomplishment, having managed a business for many years. It was hard to get used to living the same day over and over again without accomplishing anything visible or tangible. And there was interpersonal drama as well. One of the other novices thought that I was “from the devil”. I kid you not. He was very traditional and literal, and he thought that everything the church said was the indisputable truth. The problem with that, which he learned, is that there are and always have been various church authorities saying different things. I am more free thinking and spiritual. So, I can see the truth in multiple points of view. In our classes and lessons I often questioned certain ideas and traditions of the Catholic church. And I sometimes drew comparisons to what I had learned about the spirituality of India. That one guy didn’t like any of that. It got to a point where anytime I said ANYTHING, even if it was just something about lunch, he would clench his hands and jaw and breathe very heavy heavily and slowly, doing a very poor job of concealing his anger.

The novitiate house and property were very spacious, but we had to do everything together every day for the entire year. So, little interpersonal dramas like that were very palpable and being around that guy made me quite uncomfortable. I came to resent him quite a bit in return.

Now here is the story about God:

One day I was on a spiritual high. I had been struggling, and so I had been praying more and more, and my struggles had rent my heart open to receive God’s grace. When I finally broke down, he lifted me right up. I felt his loving care, and I was elated. I felt like I was existing in the palm of his hand, without any fears or cares in the world. In this mood I went out to the large garden behind the novitiate house and started shooting hoops on a portable basketball net that was set up in a patio area. In that state of spiritual elation, I could not miss a shot. I felt like God was right there with me, and there was very little separation between us. I felt like the whole world was nothing but God, and so everything was good, and all I had to do was stop thinking. Swish. Every shot went in. Swish. Swish. It didn’t matter from where I shot the ball, or how I shot the ball. Everything was going in. I started laughing. I was barely trying at all and everything was going in. Eventually I started to feel proud of myself. I felt vindicated after all the criticism I had received, both spoken and unspoken.

I started thinking to myself, “Yeah! I am the real spiritual person here! That other guy doesn’t get it. He’s so literal and worldly. He knows nothing of real spirituality.” And with that proud thought, I shot the ball and it sailed a full six feet to the right of the backboard and landed in a bush.

I don’t have to be a great writer when God gives me material like that to work with. There was no wind or other explanation. I just went from being completely “in the groove” to completely “out of whack” as soon as I indulged in self-aggrandization and looking down on others. And it’s not like I missed the shot by a little bit. No, that would not have been a clear enough message. Out of countless basketball shots I have taken in my life, that was by far the biggest miss.

What lessons can be learned from this story? Here are some:

Yes, the more absorbed you are in thinking about God, the better everything is going to go for you. Why? Because you are not thinking about selfish gains. You are only thinking about God, and the more you think about God, the more that you think like God. God’s love is a powerful force which fills and purifies our hearts. The more that we let God’s love in, the more we will act in loving ways in the world. And, when we act out of love, we usually get the best outcome for everyone involved. What’s more, when you really let go of your ego for a short time and make room for the Holy Spirit to do what is best, he will inspire your actions, so that you do the right thing without any forethought. That is how I eventually made peace with that other brother. I prayed a lot for help and then, when he was near me, I just tried to make space for the Holy Spirit to guide us, and we ended up having positive interactions which, over time, blossomed into a genuine friendship.

God is a generous and attentive teacher. He will help us succeed in trivial things (like shooting a basketball) so as to encourage us to also rely on him for help with important things, like relationships and parenting. Despite being busy and having a lot of responsibilities, God will invest in those trivial moments with you because A: he loves you and B: it will help build your relationship.  

No, God won’t make you great at sports just because you ask. In sports there are always winners and losers. There are implications for everyone involved and God won’t do anything that hurts anyone else for you. The same goes for business or anything else. God cannot always give us the job we want because there may be someone who needs it more. I was shooting a basketball by myself in a back yard. Whether I hit or missed didn’t matter to anyone else. God just helped me make every shot for a while in order to teach me a lesson, that is all. When I play sports now, I pray that everyone has fun and stays safe. When I do that, I always have a good time, even if I don’t score that many points. One time I didn’t pray before a game. I remember thinking that it didn’t matter. In that game I broke my ankle.  

Yes, spirituality is a matter of the heart. No, that does not mean that traditions and literal interpretations are always wrong. The other guy in the story was genuinely trying his best to learn about God and life. He and I had very different life experiences up until then and I was better able to reach out from my heart at that time. But he was more receptive to the graces found in the Catholic tradition. So, both our approaches were good. Eventually I learned to appreciate the Catholic traditions more and he learned to be more contemplative.

Final lesson: God is in this world. It might not seem like it. But he is in this world and will make himself known to you if you open your heart up to him. He will help you with whatever you need help with, as long as it doesn’t do any harm to anyone else. Your whole life can be a swish, if you remember to rely on God and leave your ego out of it.