Blobs with arms: The impossibility of describing God

“Do you have hair?” This was coming from the boy staring directly at me from across the table. “I have some hair”, I said. The boy looked down at his drawing and added three short vertical lines coming up from the roundish head/body which represented me. It had legs and arms, all of which were angled at 90 degrees at the joints. It had a smile and two eyes. “I’m almost done. I just need to do your moustaches.” He squinted at me, then added three short vertical lines coming down from the chin, which was the bottom of the head/body.

My wife once asked me how I introduce the concept of God to kindergarteners. It is tough. Once I tried to tell the kids that God is always there for us, even though we can’t see him. A little girl put up her hand and said, “God is eating his lunch in his office.” Most kids are not quite that “Out to lunch”, but it is still hard for them to understand God.

Explaining who God is and what he does is a lot like trying to sketch a portrait of someone when you have the skills of a 4 year old. (I appreciated his sketch, BTW.) I do believe that many people have close relationships with God, by way of which they come to understand him very well. (God is not shy. He does not hide from us. It is usually a case of our egos closing us off from God.) But when it comes to describing God, the pictures we create are about as accurate as the minion-resembling sketch that boy made of me. Those who are humble and faithful have felt the grace, peace, and love of God in their hearts. Those who are bold in their faith have experienced little miracles, and moments of togetherness with God. But any attempt to describe God and his activities in detail leaves one confused. There are big questions that are hard to answer. I am sure that you can think of many examples of such questions.

This isn’t THE drawing that he did. But it is similar.

I find that God does not work by giving us intellectual understanding. God works in the moment. He works through us and speaks through us when we turn to him in our greatest need. I’ll give an example: I was once having a hard time with one of the brothers in my order. It was COVID and we were all struggling. He was a superior, and he was used to preaching to small crowds, and directing the operations of the convent and chapel. All of that stopped during COVID so, whether he realized it or not, he switched to preaching at us and micromanaging the younger brothers. We had butted heads over a few things and there was festering resentment between us. One of the great things about living in a religious community is that you are always reading about, and hearing about virtue. Our communal prayer book, itself, was telling me that I needed to forgive the guy. And, I knew it. The resentment was bad. It hurt my heart. I wanted peace. So, I prayed for help to get along with the guy. I prayed A LOT for help to get along with the guy. Then one evening I walked by the door to the kitchen and saw him inside. I could have walked past but instead I stopped. I walked in, filled the kettle, and just stood there, facing him while I waited for the water to boil. He started talking. He was muttering, really. It was just small talk about his day and some of the challenges imposed by COVID. I tried to just listen and be polite. His body language changed. He seemed to loosen up. He started talking to me more, and I responded, trying to be as friendly as possible. He started smiling. He became warm and friendly. We ended up talking for a while. After that, things got much better between us. We made peace, and it was a great weight off my heart. All of this happened on its own. God didn’t tell me what to do or say. I didn’t go down to the kitchen with a play book. I went down there with a willingness to let the Holy Spirit in. I walked my body into the kitchen but left my ego at the door.

The bible describes the Holy Spirit like wind (John 3:8) not like a jar full of air. The Holy Spirit is dynamic. It is not something that one can find, hold, and keep. One must surrender to its action. Things go best for me when I ask God for help and then trust that He WILL help me.

This is how ai thinks God looks, apparently. It is better than a blob-man, at least.

Kindergarten students do not ask very complicated questions about God, spiritual philosophy, and metaphysics. So, that saves me from having to try to explain things which are beyond human understanding (thus making blob-man pictures). When I was younger, I used to be very interested in the complicated spiritual philosophy questions. Now I am more concerned with day-to-day life. I want to be patient, kind, selfless, and loving with my students, my coworkers, and my wife. I am not thinking about what will happen after I die. I am thinking about today, tomorrow, and next week. Sometimes, as a teacher, I don’t know what to do. So, I pray for help. Then, when I am in the moment, I find that I somehow do the right thing, without thinking about it. God doesn’t tell me what to do. I just place my full trust in him, I make room for his grace, and then good things happen.

I think that the main thing that I need to teach kindergarteners is to trust God. I tell them that God is their friend, and they can always ask him for help. They can ask him for help to calm down, or to feel less afraid, or for help getting along with others.

That is my advice for adults as well: trust God and ask him for help. God will help us exactly as much as we let him.